A Positive.

This morning I woke up in the middle of the night really early.  Like 3:30am early.  I was WIDE awake.  My first thought is, I hope it is at least 5am.  But, gosh darn it it was only 3 twenty something...!  And this wasn't the first night.  I woke up in the middle of the night at least 4 times in the past few weeks.  Very odd.

So back to this morning.  I had made a deal with myself (one of those official-but-changed-your-mind-a-million-times-already-in-your-head deals) that I would not pee on a stick until Tuesday. But, I woke up early and with an urgency I decided to just go ahead and do it.  So I did.  And then I carried that pee stick to my nightstand and tried to fall back asleep. Well, imagine my surprise when my iphone screen showed enough light to read "Pregnant" (while squinting with only one eye open).  Holy cow.  I then had to get back up and walk to the bathroom to read it again with enough light to ensure I wasn't just seeing things.  Sure enough, it still said "Pregnant".   So, what do I do now?  Well of course, pee on another stick!  So that is what I did.  Except this time there was not the same urgency if you know what I mean.  Long story short, this test did not work because of lack-of-data.  And then I was out of sticks.

I climbed back into bed and tried desperately to fall back asleep.  But I couldn't.  So at 5:05am, I officially got out of bed (tired eyed but wide awake) and decided to take Milo for a walk.  It was just me. My dog.  And the paper guy that drives a white station wagon.  The rest of the neighborhood was still asleep.  It was a full moon too (or at least looked like one- I think technically the full moon is tomorrow night).  Anyway, it was a peaceful walk.  It was just what I needed: fresh air.

I then came home and told the boyfriend.  (A very sleepy boyfriend, mind you).  And he said, "Really?" And I said, "Yes, really but don't get your hopes up.  I already googled false positive and it said that is not likely but you can get a chemical pregnancy, early miscarriage, ect."  I pretty much rambled off anything that could go wrong.  Because that is how I roll.  I prepare for the worst.  I hope for the best, every time!  But, you always have to prepare for the worst.  And he said, "Ok."  Because that is what he does.  He says just enough for me to know how much he cares and understands.  Ok is all I needed to hear.

Looking back on the last week, I haven't felt much different at all.  There are only two "symptoms" that I noticed.  #1.  Very hungry.  Like I want to eat the refrigerator, hungry.  This is not surprising as I always feel this away about a week before my period.  #2.  Chills.  This is the only thing that was odd (other than the waking in the middle of the night).  Several times throughout the day I'll get a "chill" through my body.  Most the time I blame it on how freezing cold we keep our house because we are cheap.  But even throughout my work day I would get a chill.  It kinda feels like the chills you get when your getting sick with the flu or something.

So, I am pleasantly surprised with today but guarded.  Excited for the future and have said many of prayers throughout the day.

New deal with myself:  no peeing on pee stick again until Wednesday morning.

Slice of Life

I am 10dpo today.  I am not having the feeling that this is the cycle, so time will tell.  I hate to wish my life away, but I have found myself doing that a lot lately.  Telling myself, please hurry up next four days!  Looking forward to a new cycle and new start!

I'm going to let the captions pictures do the talking!

My handsome man hard at work studying for his paramedic finals.  He is never one to be the spotlight, but I love taking his photo.  Looking extra cute with his new hair cut!

Milo had his 1 year physical yesterday.  He got a great check up!  The doctor and assistant were SO impressed with his personality.  What a lovely dog he is.  He does need to lose a few pounds... story of our life!  He loves food just as much as I do!  He had to have a rabies vaccination as well.  Last time he had this vaccine he had an allergic reaction so she gave him a pre injection of antihistamine.  He was out for the count the rest of the afternoon.  I had to keep a close eye on him in case he had the reaction again, so he slept on his bed right by me while I sat at the kitchen table working on our budget.

Milo helping  me paint the interior front door.  So excited to see it done!

A little crafting over the weekend.  I updated our front door with a wreath and cloth rosettes. 

I had a cup of coffee this week!  It is probably my second cup of coffee in two months.  I have to admit it was pretty darn tasty.  Hit-the-spot! 

What I'm loving lately?  Grapefruit.  I have only bought a few because they are expensive.  Grapefruit is one of those things that I didn't like as a child but have grown to love.  

Just a Tuesday night

I just thought I would jot down a few of my thoughts.  Today was a long day at work.  One of those it-feels-like-its-Friday-but-its-only-Tuesday days.

The "no spend lenten challenge" has continued to be a challenge, but I have found empowerment through my self discipline so far.  It is in the little things like not buying that hot chocolate on my way home from the grocery store.  Or, tomorrow I am driving to Watertown for work and there is a fabulous outlet mall on my way.  I love to stop there and browse the stores... banana republic, loft, nike, ect... but tomorrow I will not stop!  Would I like a new workout outfit?  Absolutely.  Do I need a new outfit?  No.  I found myself even being more disciplined in the grocery store tonight.  I tried to stick to my grocery list.  Although, I did buy a few things off my list (cough) roasted red pepper hummus and pita chips!  Both are not organic and are processed and the chips even have white flour! Oh my.

AND I have to admit to eating my weight entirely way too much chocolate/dessert lately!  I have totally fallen off that bandwagon.  Man, Valentines day has really done a number on my sugar intake.  I will get that in check starting tomorrow! :)

But, overall my diet has been pretty good.  I still believe in the 80-20 rule.  80% all good for you and 20% whatever you want!

What I ate today:

Breakfast:  1 slice sprouted grain bread- 1 or 2 tbl avocado- 1 egg fried in coconut oil
Snack:  Handful of raw almonds with a few M&M's (dangit candy!)
Lunch:  Tuna made with avocado, cucumbers, green apple and a few crackers
Dinner:  Baked Chicken, Baked Sweet Potato, Spinach salad (cucumbers, green apple, carrots, no dressing)
Dessert:  A chocolate or two :)

I have been taking my new prenatal vitamin, Fertilaid for about a week.  It has dramatically increased my progesterone (at least I think so).  I am excited to see what next cycle brings.  I will definitely use an ovulation kit next cycle as I completely missed ovulation this time (did not have any EWCM what-so-ever).  Overall, feel pretty good.  A few headaches the last few days but I'm attributing that to the mega sugar overload.

Lenten Challenge Update

It has been only three days into the challenge... WELP!  I stopped in Target after the gym yesterday and it took everything I had to not browse the Valentines Day clearance!  Oh how I imagine how cute the decor is!

And, I cancelled my eyebrow wax for next week... only tweezing for me!

The first thing on my to do list for after lent... hair appointment!  I have decided to grow my hair out and am going to die it back to my natural color.  I might have them put a little red in the color just because I know my boyfriend likes it that way. :)

Whats on the agenda for today?  Check the online banking register and withdraw the correct amount of cash for the rest of the month.  No debit/credit card spending for me!

To my love

Happy Valentines Day Mr. Jenkins,

I am so amazed at how lucky I am to have found a guy like you.  You are that guy that every girl
dreams of... handsome, charming, selfless, hardworking, motivated, family oriented, and full of love to give.  I am thankful for your ability to compromise and to give everything you have to our marriage.  You help me to be the best person I can be by lifting me up when I need it and reminding me to come back down when I need it too.

I had a wonderful time at dinner.  We tried out a new local Mexican restaurant and it was awesome!  So stuffed!

And, I had three pieces of chocolate today! Every single one of them was to-die-for.

Lenten Challenge

Every year for the past 8 years (at least) I have given up sweets for lent.  I am not catholic, but my mom is and she always encouraged me to give something up.  I find that it is good for the soul to give up something that is difficult.  I never did it for the weight loss, I always just wanted to challenge myself.  And it is a good thing I didn't do it for the weight loss, because I have never lost any weight!  I always just ate a few more chips or crackers instead! 

This year, I wanted to try something new.  Don't get me wrong, sweets are always difficult to say no to but I wanted a new challenge. I've decided to go for a financial challenge.

6 weeks
Cash Budget only
No unnecessary spending (including but not limited to... clothing, shoes, make up, house ware, target impulses, ect)
NO EXCEPTIONS!

I'll keep you posted.  So far it hasn't been too challenging but we will see what the weekend brings.  That is when I have time to do all of my shopping!

45 DAYS TO GO!

Acupuncture Round 3

Yesterday was my third visit with my acupuncturist.  I'm just going to throw this out there... I was disappointed.  I had really high hopes going into the appointment because I had my test results back and was excited to hear her interpretation and intervention.

At the appointment she did her normal collection of data and placed the needles and electrical current, but did not go over any herbs or recommend anything.  I have to admit that I felt a little lost and without direction.

After talking with the nurse at my OBGYN last week, I was surprised at how fast they were willing to prescribe medications.  Don't get me wrong, I would love to get pregnant... like yesterday!  But, I realize that my body has (and has had for a long time, maybe forever?) issues with hormones and fertility.  I am hesitant to pump more medications/hormones into a body that is not working properly all together.

After much thought, and discussion with Jeret we have decided to take a little break from interventions. This may be only 2 weeks or however long we see fit and feels comfortable.  I'd like to try to continue to heal by body with the right foods (eliminating caffine/alcohol, limiting sugar/dairy/white flour) and exercise regularly for stress reduction.  I am going to try a supplement that is OTC and recommended by many people for balancing hormones and see where this takes us.  I am also going to continue the seed rotation diet.  In a few months, if nothing has changed with my BBT charting, CM, ect then I will probably have more tests done at the doctors office.  Just to check to make sure that there is nothing blocking my tubes.

So, that is where I stand.  I picked up a few books at the library for some weekend reading:  "The Infertility Cure" and "Making Babies".  They both talk about the right balance of homeopathic and western medicine.

Beauty supplies

As I try to aim for a more healthy and simpler life,  I am trying to be conscious about the type of chemicals that I am putting on my body.   Through the many years of anatomy class in high school and college I know that  skin is our biggest organ and is very absorbent!  Plus, I'd just like to wear less make up.  I am not sure if I could go completely makeup-less but minimal would be ideal.

In order for me to feel completely comfortable going commando in the make up department, I wanted to clear up a few things with my complexion.

First, I have to add that my acne in general has been so much better!  Since I have limited sugar, dairy and white flour my actual pimples are non existent.  I used to get really bad breakouts around my mouth and chin during menstruation.  I have not noticed any pimples in the past month or so.

The area that has always been of huge concern is the pores on my nose.  I remember even as early as 5th grade noticing that I had more pores on my  nose than anyone of my other friends.  They tend to be cleaner and smaller in the summer, but even then they have still been noticeable.  My dad has the exact same pores but his skin is naturally dark olive toned which makes the pores not as noticeable.

Here's my plan of attack--

Gentle exfoliation.  I am going to try for the time being a slurry of baking soda and water applied with a very soft toothbrush.

Poor cleansing with strips. I have to add that I tried this for the first time yesterday and was not overly pleased.  Yes, there was dirt from the pores on the strip but still a lot remained in my skin

Pore Refining toner.

Basic Neturogenia face wash (the orange stuff) applied with a Clarisonic!  I am super excited to try this.    It was hard making the initial investment... over 100 whopping bones! But I am a huge advocate of the electric toothbrush, so if it can do the same with my face I'll give it a try.

SOURCE

Oil Free Neturogenia lotion

I am figuring this will take 2 - 4 weeks to see any results.  Will keep you (you as in my make believe readers) posted...

Test Results

Yesterday I received a phone call from the nurse at the OBGYN office.  My test results were finally in! I had been checking my online "chart" at least three times a day daily to see if they were updated.  The Thyroid and Prolactin scores were in within a few days because they were done in town.  But the Testosterone, DHE A- Serum and Progesterone were sent to Mayo clinic in Rochester to be read.

DHEA- Is the principal human c-19 steroid.  It has to do with androgens and estrogens in our body.  Adrenal gland function? Acceptable range: less than 13.  My score:  8.8

17-Hydroxyprogesterone- Checks for CAH- congenital adrenal hyperplasia.  Acceptable range: less than 80.  My score:  Less than 40.

Testosterone:  Checking for PCOS.  Acceptable range: 6-80.  My score:  24.

Prolactin:  Pituitary gland function.  Acceptable range:  3-23.  My score: 12.5

TSH Sensitive:  Thyroid function.  Acceptable range:  .5 - 6.  My score: .98

I'm not sure what to think about the scores.  If they had found something, at least I would have a reason for my irregularity.  Trying to not worry about it.  I would like to see how long this cycle lasts by charting my BBT.  This will also help me to find out if I am ovulating.  Today is only day 16, so I would like to give it at least 35 days to see if I ovulate.  If not, then we will probably try a dose of Clomid.  I am interested to find out what my Acupuncturist thinks of the scores and Clomid.

Indulging in some M & M's.  Shame on me!  You can even see Milo in action with his ball on the right hand side of the photo.  

Diet Update

It has been about a month since I have "revamped" my diet, so to speak.  I just wanted to jot down a few thoughts.

Some thoughts:

• Coffee.  During the week, I rarely even think about it.  I tend to have a tall glass of water and small glass of pure orange juice instead.  I am busy getting ready for the day, so there is not much time to think about what I am missing.  On the weekends, it is an entirely different story.  Especially with the temperatures below zero, a warm cup of jo is so appealing!  Jeret tends to sleep in (not late but later than me) and I miss lounging around, catching up on blogs, pinterest and new recipes while sipping some hot coffee with cream.  I'm over the caffeine addiction.  I did have headaches the first week or two but then they were gone.  It's just the pure taste of coffee that I miss.  I wish coffee was naturally decaffeinated.  
• Sugar.  I have made huge strides on the sugar intake but I have not given it up completely.  I have made a few healthier options to desserts, but all still had sugar in them of some sort: honey, maple syrup, agave, ect.  With that being said, I am so glad that I am not stopping at the gas station for an apple fritter or eating the cookies at work anymore.  That was terrible for me!  
• White flour.  Now, this I don't really miss.  I have been pretty strict with this one.  I have had a few cheats (ie half a pretzel roll with my turkey sandwich for lunch today) and pizza when my husband makes dinner.  You just can't say no to my husbands pizza from scratch.  It is that good!   I have pretty much given given up gluten except for breakfast.  I have 1 piece of Ezekiel 4:9 bread toasted with almond butter and my ground seeds for the day.  It is the easiest way to eat those darn ground flax/pumpkin seeds.  And the seeds/sprouts that make up that bread doesn't seem to bother my digestive track.  
• Processed Foods.  I am so glad that I have made this a goal and that I am more mindful.  My acupuncturist asks me a lot of questions at the beginning of our meetings about how I feel and any ailments that I have had this past week.  And I honestly can say that I have had high energy, sleeping well, no acne and overall pretty darn good mood because of the diet changes alone.  
• Exercise.  I still have improvements to make in this arena but I am making an effort to exercise at least 3 x per week.  But boy am I looking forward to spring and getting outside to walk/run!
• And I have lost a few pounds.  Definitely not the goal, but much welcomed. :)

Car trouble, again.

The past few days I noticed a slight grinding noise coming from my left rear tire/brake.  At first I thought maybe it was a large piece of ice hitting the tire as I slowed down.  After I noticed the noise for a few days, I realized there was definitely something wrong with the brakes.  Thankfully, I only had two nursing homes to visit on Friday and they were both in Madison.

I drove straight home and waited for Jeret to get home from work before running any errands.  I didn't want to go anywhere that I didn't have to incase I had car trouble.  After dinner, Jeret took me to all of the places I needed to go.  It really felt like the olden days.

This morning he got to work on the brakes.  I am so thankful for a husband that is unafraid to try something he has never done before.  I am amazed at how well he can problem solve and figure out how to fix rear brakes without any experience.

Excuse the mess.  Jeret working on the brakes in a freezing garage!

Not to mention he saved us lots of $$$.  Rear Brake Pads/Rotors Est: 415$ Jeret's cost: 85$ Boom!

Student Loan Paid OFF!

I had to document the day we (and I say we because my husband whole heartedly accepted my debt as his own) paid off my student loan!  We had two other small loans that we paid off earlier in our marriage: ie my ring and my car.  But today is special because my student loan wasn't dinky or small or in the four digits.  It was 6 whole digits (25k) long!  Now, that is a lotta money!

20 year loan paid in 2.5 years BOW CHICK A WOW WOW

I am proud that the only debt we have is our mortgage.  And we hope to get that paid off early too. ;)

#daveramsey
#cheapos
#onlyeatoutforspecialoccasions
#secondhand furniture

Acupuncture Round 2

Today was my second appointment with the acupuncturist.  She was pleased to hear that I had had some blood work done.  I was sorry that the results were not in yet, but they should be ready for next week!

She went over my basal body temperature chart and talked about a few other things: cervical mucous, ect.

This time she applied the needles in different spots.  She also applied an electrical current to the needles in my stomach to help activate the ovaries.  That was an interesting sensation.  You feel little "pricks" of electricity.  But about half way through the treatment I couldn't feel them any longer.

I felt much more relaxed at this appointment.  I really tried to meditate and focus on body healing and balance.

P.S.  After the treatment my mom called, so I was filling her in on my experience.  When I told her about the electrical current she said that my little eggs were jumping around doing summersaults!  What a great thought!